The Wish-Granting Game

Granted, 800 million dollars is negligible to the USfg, and now the CIA is after you.

I wish more people in my town had seen Scott Pilgrim vs. The World :\

 

Granted. They all hated it. :eek:
I wish that people understood me and my spastic nature

 

Granted. doesn't make it any more tolerable tho.

i wish <noun>

 

Okay. All nouns are now permanently deleted due to the lack of specifity in your wish.

That were undeleted.

 

wish , nouns again. however, verbs.

I you not that.

 

Don't worry, no you intend I to.

I wish for the Elder Wand.

 

GRANTED!
You are posesed by an evil spirit who forces you to rob a bank using your wand, sadly you are caught, arrested and thrown in a concrete 50 inch cell. Fortunately, your evil spirit rescues you but then forces you to kill your friends and family and also sends you to mars.

I wish I had the biggest collection of spoons!

 

wish granted. the weight crushes you.

i wish bombs.

 

Bombs wish you!

I wish in Soviet Russia.

 

Wish granted. Soviet Russia is now in you.

I wish I could get a decent game of GG2 in.

 

Granted. Your girlfriend puts her clothes back on and leaves in order for it to be kept decent.

I wish I could like people's comments on statuses of my non-friends.

 

Granted. You can like them, but unfortunately the people of the internet will not know, as there will still be no button for you to click.

I wish I had a better work ethic.

 

Granted. You are sold into slavery, and being threatened with horrible torture motivates you to work harder.

Genie, I wish for your freedom!

 

granted, i run away and curse everyone who ever used me while i was trapped with the death of their ancestors, eliminating hundreds of million of people who were, are, and will be. hope you're happy.

i wish for stuff

 

Granted, you get stuffing. Inside of you. Plus you are now deliciously delectable.

I wish I controlled the sun.

 

Possibly Granted, but The public (the Plebs) don't see you as a God. A large amount of the population do, but a considerable amount doesn't. Physicists try to solve how the hell your powers are even possible. They make the assumption that your actions and observations are directly related to the sun's abnormal behaviour but in the end a team of austrian physicists propose a theory that all of this is random and happening simply by chance, as if it were just Quantum Fluctuation happening at more larger scales. This new theory brings increased media attention, many riots start happening and eventually you are assassinated by Solemdeus (latin. Deus = God) extremists who, ironically, want to "send you back to the sun". After your death, the strange events continue happening for a few more years. Then one faithful afternoon the sun's performance becomes normal again. Scientists rejoice, yet your followers still continue blindly following your new formed religion, argumenting it with a simple "His work here was done" aphorism.

I wish I could make a mod/game based on that story I just wrote.

 

Granted but the game ends up being so horrible you become bankrupt because you forgot the quality ensurance team.

i wish i had the snake.

 

Granted, but you soon find that you wish that you got the Spur instead, 'cause it's better.

I wish Cave Story was longer and less annoying at the beginning.

 

Granted, but it's much more annoying everywhere except the beginning.

I wish I could code faster.

 

Granted but you code so fast you make a lot of screw ups.

I wish pixel made some good cavestory merchandise and gave me a copy of each.