The Wish-Granting Game

Granted. Now everyone is pissed at you for waking them up. Have fun facing an angry sleep-deprived mob.

I wish I could find the Karnaugh map for love (and that the next poster will get the reference).

 

Granted, however, no one else cares what the fuck you're saying.
I wish I was in TV.

 

granted, i cram you into one of those tiny fold-up tvs that come in SUVs.

i wish for welfare.

 

Fuck What You Want, You Live In A Life Of Misery
MWA HHAA HHAAA

I wish I held a guiness world record.

 

Granted, you have the record for most painful death.

I wish chaos.

 

?_?

Why the hell would you ask for that?
You die in the chaos.

I wish I Won!

 

Granted, but you win at failing at life.
I wish people weren't douches.

 

Granted. They are dickweeds.

I wish for a paypal account

 

Granted, but you have to pay $100googol to access it.
I wish that I could make another "message to" video on my Youtube account without it appearing on these forums.

 

wish granted. it is mocked on every forum in the world EXCEPT this one.

i wish /b/ would die in a fire

 

Not granted, something that isn't alive cannot die.

I wish I wasn't a failure.

 

Granted. You are now an...
EPIC SUPER DARK FAILURE!!!!!
I wish I didn't have to kill my dog

 

Granted. These nice boys kill it for you.

I wish I could do the ten-point slash properly.

 

Granted. You perform it on yourself. (btw, that anime was hilarious, at least to my tastes >:3)
I wish that Tokyo Mew Mew A La Mode was real. It'd be sooooo kawaii!

 

Granted. But since it's A La Mode, everyone eats it before you get a chance to even see it.

I wish the sun would fly up
very very high up
and make the water dry up
from that Big Water.
(and that the next poster will get the reference)

 

not granted, as i niether have the power to move the sun nor do i get that reference.

i wish people would post explanations for every potentially obscure reference they make

 

Granted, but now every obvious reference is explained in greater detail than the obscure ones?

Why did the baby Metroid on Metroid: Other M die?

 

Because you posted in the wrong game thread =/

I wish that Jacob Xanth were my brother

 

Granted, but he now acts like a dick towards you and steals your friends.
I wish that I lived near the MythBusters.

 

Granted. You are now their test dummy.

I wish for a small, negligible amount of U.S. currency.