Love

If I was to be isolated I could live with it as long as I had internet.

Really?

 

yeah, because then it wouldn't be isolation.

 

by definition

 

Anyone has a clue why I fell in love and was always rejected by ugly girls (ugly by other people`s standards), while always and always the most beautiful that everyone wanted were crazy about me - and I rejected them all the time. I don`t consider myself particularly handsome (I once thought I`m ugly and was timid) so I don`t get it. I was once even "attacked" by a most gorgeous girl like this:

she was all around me weeks so couldn`t get her off my back. Wanted to get attention all ways imaginable. Quarrel, watching me all the time embarrassing herself...She wanted to get me in an empty hallway like this (I was reading a book unaware of her approaching):
<she>: What are you doing here...
<me>-I`m just reading this...
<she finishes her sentence>...alone?
--she hugs me and start to pet me--
I don`t react and froze, pretend nothing happened to save her dignity. Started to talk about some neutral things like:
<me>What do we have to learn for the practical class of infectious diseases for next week? - my desperate attempt to save her pride so everything looks like it was only a friendly hug - in case anyone saw us. The hallway was empty though
She answered something briefly, smiled and walked away. She avoided me from that time and never talked to me again...

Felt sorry for her yet wasn`t in a bit interested...

Other occasion a beautiful girl started to cry in front of me after rejection (it was a really polite and sensitive rejection) for long...I felt so sorry

Btw. I plan to "die alone", and don`t plan any relationships ever. I`m straight male though (man look really disguisting to me), just frigid (not impotent, have desires, just lazy to get a girl or smt?)...Show me any girl and I`ll reject her...I was in ugly girls when I was a teen, now I reject them all..,and don`t get why... Maybe me being hard to get attracts this? It`d be more easy if girls would just leave me alone.

 

Re: Love question

Beautiful women tend to be extroverts and act spontaneously. I think you just emphasise their actions too much, since they probably do that stuff to everyone - not only you.

 

Re: Love question

Beautiful women tend to be extroverts and act spontaneously. I think you just emphasise their actions too much, since they probably do that stuff to everyone - not only you.

You might be right there. They know they are pretty and are eccentric since they are certain they`ll get the boy for sure. I think these 2 girls were also a bit inexperienced with boys so acted somewhat childishly. I noticed these kind of girls tend to be quite frigid towards many boys who "worship" them - but I`m certain they just act like that. To be honest, I don`t care that much. Thank you for the answer though

 

How old are you, trickybilly?

 

I`m 26 now. These 2 cases happened earlier though. The first girl was about 24 (23?) (I was 23 then. I put a ? after her age since I don`t know for certain if she failed a year at the university and was therefore a year older than me or came from an other med. university. First option is way more likely.), the "crying" girl was about 19-20 (me too).

 

Oh okay. Considering your age you probably have worked out how and have better psychologically prepared yourself to do that 'forever alone' thing. To me its less on an option and i'd rather take the absurd risk of chasing one single girl I wholeheartedly love to avoid being alone.

 

Hah, I doubt I'd mind if I was foreveralone.jpg. If I had an activity that truly made me happy, whether it's drawing funny pictures online or jumping off cliffs and opening your parachute at the last second - as long as it gave me happiness and fulfillness.

 

Hah, I doubt I'd mind if I was foreveralone.jpg. If I had an activity that truly made me happy, whether it's drawing funny pictures online or jumping off cliffs and opening your parachute at the last second - as long as it gave me happiness and fulfillness.

Are you seriously sure you won't go insane from loneliness?

I mean, I would. I just can't empathise with your line of though.

 

Maybe he's just already gone insane, long ago.

 

Obviously.

 

Depends on what you mean when you say loneliness. As in does it count if you interact online?

 

No. That's still social interaction.

 

I`m not lonely since I have the most wonderful friends and good acquaintances offline and online. I was considered the best and kindest doc at my former workplace, the nurse cried when I was commanded to another village, my former patients rush to me whenever they see me.

 

No. That's still social interaction.

Then that means I party every night.

 

Depends on what you mean when you say loneliness. As in does it count if you interact online?

No, not sorta like that... If online interaction is allowed, but real life conversations with strangers/acquantances/friends were rare and incidental, and romantically-inclined conversations with girls non-existent, could you really live like that for the rest of your life and not go insane?

I dunno if it extends to you, but I know I would at least go slightly insane.

I wrote this in my personal blog somewhere and thought it was relevant:

"i believe i have opened up a big can of worms by opening myself up in order to pursue a girl. my old self, before the status quo had changed, would have been fairly fine with being alone. my old self could have taken the path of lifelong loneliness, and psychologically prepared himself to make that aim a success (although a slow erosion of my sanity, culminating in some awful public explosion of lonely feelings and sexual tension is likely). but it is in the nature of a man to take risks, and the nature of a thoughtful man to take calculated ones. by opening myself up i stand to undergo suffering and not even be rewarded for those efforts with success, but i also get the opportunity to have the ultimate happiness."

 

so uh, are you gonna like, answer me >_>

edit: sorry if this is rude..

 

Alrighty then. I don't know how reply to that but I'll try. That's a pretty intelligent and well written quote. It truly is the nature of a man to take risks, sometimes just for the sake of it. But it seems that you generalize interactions and romance. As if it doesn't matter with who you are as long as you aren't "alone". Instead of thinking "I don't want to be alone" you should be thinking "I want to be with this person". Really, I have nothing more to write.