The Wish-Granting Game

Wish granted! Pay NASA 2.3 billion dollars and you can do just that.

I wish Billy Mays was still alive; his words were loud and his face was beard.

 

Wish Granted, However he does not exist in this world anymore.

I wish that someone would grant my last wish!

 

Your wish is granted: everyone's either mildly irritated by you or indifferent. Everyone thinks you're too morbid, and your "emo" thing got old 12 years before you joined the forums. The only person who actually hates you is DragonBoots, who you may actually be a split personality of.
Also, you have cancer.

I wish you'd leave the forums, since no matter how you interpret this wish, you will still leave the forums, unless you break the game rules.

 

I wish that someone would grant my last wish!

(Sorry, we posted nearly at the same time)
Wish granted!

...You then learn you recieved Genital Herpes and were then pregnant, and the blunt trauma to your head gave you amnesia, requiring you to retake kindergarden. Also, the Date-Rape drug used in you while you struggled against the blunt trauma resulted in an intense allergic reaction, imparing your speech for the rest of your life.

I wish my Internet connection was was 5 gigabytes per second.

EDIT: damn it Captain!

 

@whyme: there's probably a difference between morbid and bat-shit insane.

@igotsthepower: Your wish is granted, however 100 viruses invade your computer and wipe your hard drive. And the radiation from the internet connection (I'm not going to bother explaining this since it's implausible) gives you Super Cancer.

I wish for more time.

 

Wish granted, but it was wasted asking for more time.

I wish for someone to comfort me...

 

Congratulations! Your wang is now 9 inches wide! You are the proud owner of a chode! You must now get all of your underwear/boxers tailored to fit your wang.

I wish I could fling any person off of Earth, sending them hurdling into the sun, and that I could fling any person off Earth that I wanted.

Wish granted, but keep in mind that for every action, there is an equal opposite reaction.

I wish time would stand still ):

 

Wish Granted, it stopped for 5 years and then continued where it left off as if nothing happened.

I wish people would stop posting at the same time.

(hence: I wish for my last wish to be granted)

 

(hence: I wish for my last wish to be granted)

Wish granted!

A stranger from the street comforted you, then drugged you and brutally stabbed you to death.

I wish I could fly.

 

Poof! You are now on board a flight to India. Fortunately, you never have to set foot in India, because you're tackled and held for questioning, since you sudenly appeared on an airplane.

I wish I had some delicious breakfast cereal.

 

you get your favorite breakfast cereal.
fool.

I wish I had opposable toes and that all my shoes automatically had opposable toe holes in them and that nobody would make fun of me and that no negative consequences - only positive ones - would come of me having said opposable toes.

 

You now have opposable toes and cancer.

I wish two flies and a sack of potatoes were my friends.

 

You now have opposable toes and cancer.

I wish two flies and a sack of potatoes were my friends.

Wish granted!

...The potato was rotten to the core, and the two flies died on the spot. Oh, and the said potato happened to a time bomb inside.

I wish I could make wings spawn on my back, like a bird, and could make them vanish whenever I wanted them too. I also wish I could USE them to fly, and that I was immune to any form of cancer.

 

Granted.
As you try your new wings, You cross a high-security airbase.
U.S. Army is not amused to see that.
Enjoy your heat-seeking missiles.


I wish for Total Annihilation on THIS earth.

 

Granted.
As you try your new wings, You cross a high-security airbase.
U.S. Army is not amused to see that.
Enjoy your heat-seeking missiles.


I wish for Total Annihilation on THIS earth.

Wish granted.

THIS earth was annihilated, being the earth you stand on. the earth your hometown stands on and the earth of everybody you care about was annihilated, while you and the ones you care about were the only ones killed.

I wish I could create an excellent mod without thinking about it.

 

[Offtopic]
Your logic doesn't apply here.
I care about no one... so you didn't grant my wish.
No one was annihilated.
[/Offtopic]

 

[Offtopic]
Your logic doesn't apply here.
I care about no one... so you didn't grant my wish.
No one was annihilated.
[/Offtopic]

[Offtopic] The earth of your hometown was destroyed anyways, so I still DID grant your wish.[/offtopic]

 

[Offtopic]I didn't wish for the destruction.
I wished for Total Annihilation.[/offtopic]

 

I wish for this thread to get back on topic

 

[offtopic]One, "total annihilation" is redundant, and two, he in fact did grant your wish. Where do you think all the people on this earth go, Narnia?[/offtopic]

@igotsthepower9000: Granted. But now you can't stop thinking about creating mods, thus ruining your ability.

I wish for the death of every stupid human on the Earth.