The Wish-Granting Game

Granted. Your pack of cards is scattered evenly across all 50 states, with the King of Spades in Washington, DC and the Queen of Hearts somewhere in Canada.

I wish it was raining men.

 

I wish it was raining men.

Granted. All men in the world rain from the sky. The women are killed by billions of bodies hitting the ground at great speeds worldwide. All men go ker-splat and die. With all males dead the few remnant pregnant females try to restart the Human race but the post-apocalyptic conditions and a new mutated disease spread from the dead bodies become too much for the children and a number don't reach adulthood, including the select few males. The remnants all eventually die, either early on or from old age. Your wish wiped out the Human race, 'grats.

...

Maybe I went a little overboard there..

wish= new Wish();
language= new SpokenLanguage();
language->set(get_current_syntax(THIS),LANG_ALL);
wish->set('spoken_language','all',language->get());

 

I... Have no Idea exactly what that's supposed to mean... So...
You now can only speak in an alien language that no one else understands.

I wish I could understand what andwhyisit is saying, both in his wish and when he's speaking (LANGUAGE NAME UNWRITABLE).

 

I'm pretty sure Andwhy wants everyone to speak a new language, one with the same syntax as English? Okay, it's a language spoken entirely with your nose.

I wish I was covered in post-it notes.

 

I think andwhy's wish was for every spoken language to become C/C++.

Anyway...

I wish I was covered in post-it notes.

Granted. These post-it notes are of the exceptionally ultra sticky variety, so you have to choose between causing yourself a ton of pain by ripping them off, or walking around covered in sticky notes for the rest of your life. Also, you're not wearing anything else under the sticky notes.

I wish I were wearing something else under the duct tape.

 

Granted. It's more duct tape.

I wish for a roll of duct tape.

 

Granted. It's about 1000000 times larger than your typical everyday roll of duct tape and it falls from the sky and crushes you.

I wish my school's internet filter didn't block me when I hit "post reply" (not making this up; it has no problem just viewing the forums, but as of today it won't let me reply (unless I use Firefox)).

 

Wish granted; use Firefox, you twit.
I wish people would stop using Internet Explorer.

 

Granted. Now noone can access the Internet, because they can't use IE to even download other browsers (deleted from everyone's harddiscs).

I wish Internet Explorer was useful for more than just downloading Firefox.

 

Granted. It's also useful for downloading Google Chrome.

I wish for cold hard cash.

 

Granted. You recieve a map of the antarctic with coordinates of several tons of frozen money.

I wish Archon would get released before StarCraft II.

 

I wish Archon would get released before StarCraft II.

Granted. The cavemen are not sure what to do with it though.

I wish for the wish that will appear (or "has appeared" depending on how long this post has been here for) on post 500 to be granted for me as well.

 

Granted. Unfortunately it will be (or "was" depending on how long this post has been here for) a wish for your eternal torture.

I wish I didn't have so much homework.

 

sure, but your day randomly dissappears.
randomly.

I wish I could compose.


(when'd your name change cheesy?)

 

Granted. You undo all the work done by decomposers (i.e. bacteria, fungi, etc). The world is now cluttered with non-decayed dead bodies. Way to be.

Also: battabing battaboom

I wish the Prime Minister of England would announce "The Game is over." on public television.

 

Granted, but all the non-Brits watching lose The Game.

I wish I hadn't just lost The Game.

 

I wish I hadn't just lost The Game.

Granted. You won, everyone else lost because you won, the entire world hates you, and 1/10 people you meet want to dethrone you by any means necessary.

I wish that the wish of the poster that grants this wish will not be granted, but will be granted the wish of the following poster by the third poster to come after this post, in which the second poster to come after this post must respond with "Not granted." and be granted the wish of the the poster that grants this wish by the third poster to come after this post as well, while the second poster to come after this post isn't granted his/her own wish.

 

Granted.

I wish that andwhyisit's wish made more sense to me.

 

Not granted.

I wish for you guys to follow Andwhyisit's wish.

 

Not granted.

I wish I didn't have to wait six weeks to get a Trident II missile.