sinophile said:
As for clinginess, Ive talked to a guy from another forum and identified that as a pothole im likely to step in. So I set up a few restrictions for myself. Sure, I can enjoy our time together, but she has to be down with it too. No constant phonecalls and SMSs and stuff (actually I dont have a mobile phone so this isnt a problem :/). I will not commit emotional blackmail and tell her how disraught i'd be if she left me.
Well how are you going to know when it's okay to say something? Do you want to spend your whole time with her guessing and second-guessing what to say and when? I assume you know what this is like, and I have no idea why you think it'll be tolerable.
sinophile said:
I wouldn't really mind reading a wall of text, but if it makes you cringe after writing it then whatever.
If I start rambling, I will definitely sound crazy.
sinophile said:
Overall, I genuinely don't think your comments apply to me. I thank you for sharing your experience, but I say you should realise im not neccesarily walking down a similar road to you. I think maybe you've been burned by a girl in the past, and you're trying to steer me away from a similar situation. Seriously, thanks for that.
I'm not projecting, I'm just saying that moving on is easier than you think, and it would probably be for the better at this point. Not that you will, but I can always say I told you so.
sinophile said:
Im fairly, well, 'monogamous' and I don't have eyes for any other girls at the moment. This isn't really going to change unless she rejects me or we stay in the relationship for so long I start to get sick of her.
Because fuck marriage? I know it's good to think long-term as well, but try to be a little more optimistic about your optimism.
Anyway, I didn't say you should try to meet someone now. I said you will, and... well, why don't you just read what I said.
sinophile said:
I don't think she's perfect. Initially I did, but I warned myself not to do this and to keep a realistic image of her.
Perfect enough, mah boi. Perfect enough.
sinophile said:
If she wants to remain friends, I'm cool with that. We can enjoy our friendship together until I slowly got over my loss and found a different girl.
No. You aren't cool with that at all. You will not enjoy your friendship until you get over your loss, and that is much harder to do when you're still friends. The friend zone is a ter...
Wait,
remain friends? She hardly knows you. Do me a favor: if you aim for a relationship and miss, don't land in the friend zone. Land in the "fuck that, there are other women" zone because it's so much better in this case. "But I'd still be happy to be her friend" you say. Well, can't really say the same for her, can you? A massively asymmetrical friendship is not exactly an upgrade.
sinophile said:
If she rejects me I'm not going to let myself get all heartbroken and start whining and listen to "Alice->Dere" on repeat all day. It will be tough but I'll try my best to take responsibility and get over it.
It all sounds straightforward on paper, doesn't it? Why don't you find something else to live for sooner rather than later, to avoid... you know.
MetaSeraphim said:
Not like the penis/scrotum is going to go home with any gold medals. Nothin more I hate than a man with hair on his scrotum, that is just sickening.
I understand completely and I was not trying to compete with our genitals. However, we can shave that.