Love

I'm not even talking about this one case.
I mean in general, it's just hard to deal with.
One-sided attractions are just the first barrier

But yeah, that was a little jaded, sorry.

It's cool bro.
And yes, it is...situations like that especially

 

Im scared.

Im feeling a lot of different emotions, some I can't describe, which I haven't felt before in my life.

 

...I can see this going a number of ways, care to elaborate?

 

For the love of GOD, sinophile, this isn't Facebook. We're a supportive community, but you have to stop posting vague, whiny statements and expecting us to rush in and ask what's wrong. If you want to say something like "My situation is spiraling downwards, and here is why:" then that would be great, but don't treat this thread like your fucking Facebook page.
Now if you could clearly explain what's going on, I and (I'm sure) some others would be happy to help.

 

My friends taught me how to ride a bike yesterday.

 

That's so sweet of them <3

 

My friends taught me how to ride a bike yesterday.

What a heartwarming story. That is true love and friendship right there.

 

Took us about 1 hour.

 

Drag it out and make it the most heartwarming film of the year.
Also, can you teach me?

 

Sure thing!

 

WR:WD

The heartwarming tale of two young people and a friendship that withstood the test of time and space
There were bikes involved. You will laugh, you will cry.

 

Im not being vague, thats simply the most succinct way of describing my situation. Secondly I dont see what you have to gain from wording your responses like a prick.

Okay, heres a list of emotions ive never felt before which I have been feeling recently:
-The feeling of being NTRed AKA cheated on
-Sense of duty (I do not like doing *, but I will do it because it is good for others)
-Loneliness
-Extreme depression
-Anxiety, especially social anxiety
-Yearning (yearning to be with that girl, yearning to eat her out and give her leg-squeezing orgasms)

 

Secondly I dont see what you have to gain from wording your responses like a prick.

I was using strong language to convey how irritated I am that you are using this thread, which is supposed to be about love in general, to bitch and complain about your stupid boner for some chick you think is hot. You don't seem interested in her other qualities, or rather, you're only interested in her other qualities because she's hot. I gave you the benefit of the doubt and let myself believe you weren't simply infatuated like a hormonal teenager, but here you are, infatuated like a hormonal teenager. All you can think about is eating her out.
I know exactly what it's like (not specifically the eating out thing), so my advice at this point is to grow a pair and ask her out. If she says no, you will forget about it and move on if you know what's good for you. Do that by meeting new women. If she says yes, you get to make an ass of yourself on a date and hope she finds it endearing.
If you need help with the whole dating thing, you can talk about that. You have nothing to lose by taking dating advice from the internet.
And don't think that just because I got mad I'm your enemy.

 

Eating out somebody will not exactly be a pleasant experience for you ._.

And yeah, it seems her other qualities pale in comparison to her hotness, because that's all I'm hearing from you, really.
Just ask her out, and see what happens. What's better, taking a risk with no long-term consequences, or sitting on a computer complaining about how you're neck deep in gushing emotions?
Your next post better be about how you asked her out bro

 

Yum.
(Warning: pictures of vaginas)

 

Eating out somebody will not exactly be a pleasant experience for you ._.

Of course eating out the girl I love is a pleasant experience. I'd love to give pleasure to her. Seeing her happy makes mehappy. Making her orgasm would really turn me on.

I was using strong language to convey how irritated I am that you are using this thread, which is supposed to be about love in general, to bitch and complain about your stupid boner for some chick you think is hot. You don't seem interested in her other qualities, or rather, you're only interested in her other qualities because she's hot. I gave you the benefit of the doubt and let myself believe you weren't simply infatuated like a hormonal teenager, but here you are, infatuated like a hormonal teenager. All you can think about is eating her out.
I know exactly what it's like (not specifically the eating out thing), so my advice at this point is to grow a pair and ask her out. If she says no, you will forget about it and move on if you know what's good for you. Do that by meeting new women. If she says yes, you get to make an ass of yourself on a date and hope she finds it endearing.
If you need help with the whole dating thing, you can talk about that. You have nothing to lose by taking dating advice from the internet.
And don't think that just because I got mad I'm your enemy.

The girl I like isn't particularly hot, even by my own standards. Meanwhile, I won't lie, sexual attraction is a big part of the appeal to me, a major proportion of it in fact, but not to an unhealthy extent. While I'm still in my teens, this isn't certainly a crush (it was a crush for the first few days when i first saw her a few years ago). It is less intense and has been lasting for a very long time.

Basically I just want a good girl to do things together with. I want to chat together while we're at uni. I wanna sleep together with her in the bed. I want to just hang around at home, cooking or watching tv or studying together. On occasion we'd go out on a date. And yes, hopefully we'd have plenty of sex.

Overall, shes the only thing im living for at the moment. I don't have any goals besides 'become her boyfriend and then devote myself to her thereafter' at the moment. Yeah, I know fully well that this is an extremely unhealthy state of mind (mate i cant help it, you dont find your goals, your goals find YOU). I know fully well Im taking a risk. What if at the end of the road, the relationship is ultimately disappointing, or she rejects me? Its a prospect that causes me a lot of distress, but I anticipate and accept it if it happens and I won't allow myself to beat myself up if it happens.

I take this thing very seriously mate, and I don't want to fuck it up. So I am taking my time. Slowly improving myself so I can show her my good side. I want to show her a nice young man without lying about myself. I'll fix this crushing social anxiety. Tone down my depression and pessimism a bit. Fix my posture. Learn to sustain an interesting conversation. Engage in some healthy hobbies. I'm giving myself a reasonable amount of time to fix up my image. Asking her out while I am not myself is just suicidal.

Overall thanks for forcing myself to constantly evaluate the strategy of this. This is one thing I don't want to make a silly mistake in and I appreciate this dialogue. Yes, let us delve deeper until we've figured out a great strategy!

 

huh fab I could have sworn I made a post that was pretty much the exact same as yours (stop posting vague bullshit) but it's gone now (._.)

anyway sino looks like you have your shit sorted out, and although you probably already know this I'm going to reiterate it: don't become too clingy or let this girl pretty much run your life. I mean becoming a better person in general is pretty cool but you shouldn't feel like you need to do it for her or to get her; do it for yourself

 

Sex. Of course. That' a huge surprise there. >_>;


And why do you like vag.dis so much Fab?

 

I was going to type up a bloody essay on this. I was going to address every issue, but my mind just keeps wandering and I can't get all those thoughts down.
Here was the gist of it: if you improve yourself, you'll find someone else who you like and she'll like you and you won't have to fight just to have her notice you. You'll get along with her, she'll laugh at your jokes, and you can treat her like a regular human being instead of a goddess. She will be better than this chick. She will be a friend, not just a girl.

When you get the self-esteem you're looking for, you'll realize you don't need Miss Perfect. You can chat, sleep, hang out, cook, or watch TV with anyone, preferably someone you haven't devoted your existence to pleasing. I know devotion and commitment and all that, but what you have isn't healthy and you have to do something about it, for everyone's benefit.

I was in something with a girl, I'm gonna call it love since I don't know any better. I wanted to spend as much time with her as possible, and make sure she was never unhappy. Didn't really think about sex too much, aside from that it would make her happy.
Anyway, she just wanted to be friends. At first I was all "FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUU" but then I realized I was fine with that, because that's what friends are for, anyway. Not sex, I mean... yeah. You get it. After my romantic feelings for her evaporated, I realized I could cure my loneliness with someone else. Simple as that.

I know what you're going to say, and to that I say shut up.

TL;DR: I don't care how in love you are, you're setting yourself up for complete heartbreak.

And why do you like vag.dis so much Fab?

I guess after you wouldn't shut up about it, I gained a greater appreciation for the mucus and pus that leaks out of your baby hole.

 

anyway sino looks like you have your shit sorted out, and although you probably already know this I'm going to reiterate it: don't become too clingy or let this girl pretty much run your life. I mean becoming a better person in general is pretty cool but you shouldn't feel like you need to do it for her or to get her; do it for yourself

Thanks sexplosive, I am doing this for myself as well as for that girl. In high school I wasn't exactly good at talking, however I did not have social anxiety, I was not depressed and I was extremely motivated and had high morale when it came to studying. I want to get that back. Im disgusted at how I have lived for the past two years. I want to her to meet me when I'm at my prime and still improving, not as the depressive sack of shit I am today.

As for clinginess, Ive talked to a guy from another forum and identified that as a pothole im likely to step in. So I set up a few restrictions for myself. Sure, I can enjoy our time together, but she has to be down with it too. No constant phonecalls and SMSs and stuff (actually I dont have a mobile phone so this isnt a problem :/). I will not commit emotional blackmail and tell her how disraught i'd be if she left me.

I was going to type up a bloody essay on this. I was going to address every issue, but my mind just keeps wandering and I can't get all those thoughts down.
Here was the gist of it: if you improve yourself, you'll find someone else who you like and she'll like you and you won't have to fight just to have her notice you. You'll get along with her, she'll laugh at your jokes, and you can treat her like a regular human being instead of a goddess. She will be better than this chick. She will be a friend, not just a girl.

When you get the self-esteem you're looking for, you'll realize you don't need Miss Perfect. You can chat, sleep, hang out, cook, or watch TV with anyone, preferably someone you haven't devoted your existence to pleasing. I know devotion and commitment and all that, but what you have isn't healthy and you have to do something about it, for everyone's benefit.

I was in something with a girl, I'm gonna call it love since I don't know any better. I wanted to spend as much time with her as possible, and make sure she was never unhappy. Didn't really think about sex too much, aside from that it would make her happy.
Anyway, she just wanted to be friends. At first I was all "FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUU" but then I realized I was fine with that, because that's what friends are for, anyway. Not sex, I mean... yeah. You get it. After my romantic feelings for her evaporated, I realized I could cure my loneliness with someone else. Simple as that.

I know what you're going to say, and to that I say shut up.

TL;DR: I don't care how in love you are, you're setting yourself up for complete heartbreak.

I wouldn't really mind reading a wall of text, but if it makes you cringe after writing it then whatever.

Overall, I genuinely don't think your comments apply to me. I thank you for sharing your experience, but I say you should realise im not neccesarily walking down a similar road to you. I think maybe you've been burned by a girl in the past, and you're trying to steer me away from a similar situation. Seriously, thanks for that.

Im fairly, well, 'monogamous' and I don't have eyes for any other girls at the moment. This isn't really going to change unless she rejects me or we stay in the relationship for so long I start to get sick of her.

I don't think she's perfect. Initially I did, but I warned myself not to do this and to keep a realistic image of her.

If she wants to remain friends, I'm cool with that. We can enjoy our friendship together until I slowly got over my loss and found a different girl.

If she rejects me I'm not going to let myself get all heartbroken and start whining and listen to "Alice->Dere" on repeat all day. It will be tough but I'll try my best to take responsibility and get over it.