The Well - Captain Fabulous

1. One friend, Jesus Christ one friend. I have a hard enough time keeping friends that I only get along with, I certainly wouldn't be able to handle 15 of them all at once. It wouldn't take long before I was fed up with having no one to talk to about the deeper things in life. I'm not a terribly social person, but I can get very social with one person at a time.

2. I guess you mean quiet and shy towards me. That's a bit of a deal breaker, isn't it? If we can't communicate straightforwardly then it's not a good relationship. If being quiet and shy doesn't affect that to a great extent, then I'd take the shy one. Everyone has personality, and if they're outgoing about it then they're probably compensating for something. Shy and quiet suits me fine, and I'd rather not be bossed around. Of course, disclaimer, this isn't really what I look for in a relationship. There's a lot of other personality facets to look at.

3. You are up late asking me about girls and cars, how do you feel about your life?

 

I feel fucking stellar, thanks for asking.

Okay, two more, then I swear I'm done for now.
1. What are the little things someone can do to piss you off immensely? I'm talking like spitting in public, talking about themselves all the time, valley girl inflection, etc.
2. What are three things you absolutely love that have never come up in discussion with anyone?

 

1. This is the kind of thing that you can never come up with off the top of your head. I'll have to get back to you on this one. Edit: Don't sing along to songs in the car unless everyone in the car is doing it too. Especially if you are not a good singer. Don't fucking do that. Stop. Edit 2: I would put "almost everything my dad does" but that's not very descriptive.

2. Only one I can think of is Rock Band. I play that game all the time. By myself. Because I'm really cool. But no one else loves it as much as I do.

 

1. If a robot were to answer this question, do you think he would say "no"?

2. You are the winner of a TV quiz show. The presenter shows you three doors and says you can choose one. Behind one of the doors there is a $10,000 prize, while behind the other two there is nothing. After you choose a door, the presenter opens one of the remaining doors, and reveals that there is nothing inside. He finally asks you, "Do you want to change your choice?". Well, do you?

3. Have you really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

4. Do you think that a logical assertion that isn't true nor absurd is necessarily false?

5. Have you had enough of my stupid questions?

6. If not, does that mean you would like me to continue asking you that kind of questions?

7. Don't you feel a bit cold in that well?

 

1. Do you like pancakes?

2. Do you like trains?

3. Do you have a pet rock?

 

Aw snap, Rock Band is the shit. You are not alone Fab.

Oh, right, questions:


1. Would you rather have sex with a smokin' hot male or ugly as shit female?

2. If you had the task of designing the ideal society - let's say you get to decide on all the cultural norms/ideas, laws, governmental/economic structure, and physical infrastructure - how would you go about it? Note you only get to make these decisions once. You don't have continuous control over them, you just set the starting conditions and let things unfold.

3. Do they have Arby's in this well you're in?


If you answer either "smokin' hot male" to #1 or "yes" to #3, then I'm coming right down into that well with you!


edit:

 

1. What is your favorite WindsofWinds quote?
2. If you could control any BASIC MAGIC element, what would it be? (Earth, Wind, Water, Fire)
3. Would you rather live in the sky or under water?
4. What's the weirdest name someone has called you?
5. Which one of these awful songs would you want to listen on repeat: Rebecca Black's "Friday", Jenna Rose's "My Jeans" or Nicki Minaj's "Stupid Hoe"? Also, your dad would be singing them, not the original artists.
6. What pokemon would you want to be?
7. Who was your favorite notoriously bad member on the forums?
8. If you have to scratch your crotch in public, do you just do it or do you wait for everyone to leave?
9. Which social standard do you generally disagree with?
10. What is one strange thing you thought or believed when you were little? And I'm not talking about stuff like Santa or the Easterd Bunny. Just strange little thoughts.

I'm bad at asking questions.

 

1. If a robot were to answer this question, do you think he would say "no"?

2. You are the winner of a TV quiz show. The presenter shows you three doors and says you can choose one. Behind one of the doors there is a $10,000 prize, while behind the other two there is nothing. After you choose a door, the presenter opens one of the remaining doors, and reveals that there is nothing inside. He finally asks you, "Do you want to change your choice?". Well, do you?

3. Have you really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

4. Do you think that a logical assertion that isn't true nor absurd is necessarily false?

5. Have you had enough of my stupid questions?

6. If not, does that mean you would like me to continue asking you that kind of questions?

7. Don't you feel a bit cold in that well?

1. He wouldn't. Interesting that this is a male robot.

2. This is probably some mathematical statistics shit, right? My answer is no because I don't see why I would. If I try to explain the math, all the smart kids will pick on me because it's wrong.

3. Well now. I could just say yes, but I think that answer deserves a little more backstory. You see, there was this girl I knew in high school. We became friends in grade 10, and I developed a crush on her shortly afterward.
In the beginning, it was very clear she wasn't interested in dating me, and being friends was fine. Better than getting pushy and wrecking our friendship. But the years passed and I still didn't have a girlfriend, so, uh... I guess you could say I was getting desperate. I was hanging out with her (and a group of friends) every day at lunch, buying her presents every birthday, we even spent Valentine's Day together, because you know what it's like spending it alone.
I never "put the moves" on her though, I was really worried about screwing up our friendship, and I'm not a confident ladies' man at all. I was waiting for her to show any kind of sign that we could be more than friends, but she never did. I kind of resented that, since she must have had an idea of how I felt. I asked her to spend Valentine's Day with me, ffs. But no, I went through high school in the friend zone. We don't talk anymore. Not because we hate each other or anything.
So that, Hiino, is why I say "yes." I hope you understand.

4. Yes. I don't get it.

5. I don't know, keep asking them if you like stupid answers.

6. Again, stupid questions will get stupid answers.

7. Yes, and these slaughterfish don't exactly make the place cozy.

1. Do you like pancakes?

2. Do you like trains?

3. Do you have a pet rock?

123. sorta sure no


...fine
1. Only if you bury those fuckers in whipped cream and strawberries. Waffles are just better in every way though, especially with whipped cream and strawberries.

2. HA HA I SAW THAT VIDEO TOO o/ (train seats are usually not easy to sleep on, but other than that I am alright with trains.

3. No I don't, never have. I have stuffed animals instead. Not that I consider them pets, or talk to them anymore, but I still own them. One does not simply throw out childhood friends.

1. Would you rather have sex with a smokin' hot male or ugly as shit female?

2. If you had the task of designing the ideal society - let's say you get to decide on all the cultural norms/ideas, laws, governmental/economic structure, and physical infrastructure - how would you go about it? Note you only get to make these decisions once. You don't have continuous control over them, you just set the starting conditions and let things unfold.

3. Do they have Arby's in this well you're in?


If you answer either "smokin' hot male" to #1 or "yes" to #3, then I'm coming right down into that well with you!

1. Does a handjob count as sex? I feel like I could chicken out of this question with that. Because if it's just a handy, it doesn't matter if she's ugly. Or a man. But if we're talking about real sex here, I might have to go with the man here, solely because I don't think I could keep it up if I was looking at some buttugly whale. A handsome enough guy would be aesthetic enough for me to possible enjoy myself. I'm not a fan of dicks in my butt though, so I'd be top.

2. Um, jesus christ that's kind of a big question. This is some Bruce Almighty shit here. I'm not capable of designing a society from the ground up, and I'm pretty sure I couldn't do a better job than what I'm living in. Well, okay, if I were to make changes to my society, I would design it so that the Conservative party isn't full of assholes, and it was socially acceptable to not wear a shirt and maybe pants. That's all I got for improvements. Call me uncreative, but an entire society isn't something I want to fuck around with.

3. No, just Starbucks man. These thing are fuckin' everywhere.

1. What is your favorite WindsofWinds quote?
2. If you could control any BASIC MAGIC element, what would it be? (Earth, Wind, Water, Fire)
3. Would you rather live in the sky or under water?
4. What's the weirdest name someone has called you?
5. Which one of these awful songs would you want to listen on repeat: Rebecca Black's "Friday", Jenna Rose's "My Jeans" or Nicki Minaj's "Stupid Hoe"? Also, your dad would be singing them, not the original artists.
6. What pokemon would you want to be?
7. Who was your favorite notoriously bad member on the forums?
8. If you have to scratch your crotch in public, do you just do it or do you wait for everyone to leave?
9. Which social standard do you generally disagree with?
10. What is one strange thing you thought or believed when you were little? And I'm not talking about stuff like Santa or the Easterd Bunny. Just strange little thoughts.
I'm bad at asking questions.

1. You really like to make fun of me when I go deep. You want me to be the polar opposite, a 1mm deep Ultra asshole?

2. I don't know why I can't think of more practical applications for these, but I want to say Water so that I don't miss the toilet bowl.

3. I've always thought the sky is beautiful. I love having window seats on plane rides, because I always get to see the Rockies from 30,000 feet. Basically, living in the sky has aesthetic appeal, not to mention I'd probably be living in a floating mansion which sounds like the hypest shit. But I imagine it would get lonely in the sky. Underwater, it's dark and wet, but at least there's animal and plant life. And I wouldn't get skin cancer from sun exposure. I think I would need more variables to decide.

4.Tits McGee, thanks sister-in-law.

5. "Stupid Ho" because it's the only song that would be improved if my dad was singing it. Also, I like how you refer to these singers as "artists."

6. Pikachu obviously, so I'd get all the bitches. Perhaps Abra, because sleeping 23 hours a day and not battling at all sounds pretty fun to me.

7. Royaltyler. I miss that guy. He'll never be notorious in my heart.

8. I think you would be amazed at how stealthily we learn to scratch our crotches. People do it around you all the time and you can't tell. If it had to be a big scratch though, I'd try to hide it any way I could. If that's unavoidable, I'd just have to do it and say "Yep, I was scratching my crotch. It gets itchy down there, grandma."

9. The one where people who play a lot of video games are obviously social outcasts. I am a social outcast, and I play a lot of video games, but that doesn't go for everyone and it prevents video games from being taken seriously as a medium. Instead they are murder-simulating time-wasters for basement-dwellers and other hyphens.

10. Sometimes I'd let myself believe that my entire life and everything I was capable of observing was an elaborate setup, which everyone else was in on, and someone was always watching me. This wasn't paranoia, as I often wondered what the motives for this would even be, and I didn't try to hide anything from whoever was doing this. It was just sort of a weird, existential mind game.

 

1. Would you rather be able to go back in time 5 minutes with a 5 minute cooldown (so you can't travel back again and again to go back further), or be able to fast forward your perceived passage of time indefinitely? You would still be able to do stuff at a normal speed when fast forwarding, it would just make a work day pass laser fast.
2. Say you're single, and on a plane. A women is sitting next to you, and you proceed to make small talk for the duration of the flight. She is completely unremarkable in looks and personality. At the end of the flight, she says that she will give you $10,000 (Canadian of course) to have sex with her in the motel a block away that she's paying for. You'll reach your destination post-flight at the same time if you say yes, and it will have no impact on future events. No one will find out, and no one will question your monetary gain. Do you say yes or no?
3. If you could stop time for 10 minutes each day, what would you do with your time? (saw this one on askreddit, genuinely curious)
4. You could have any animal as a pet. Food, living, and medical costs for this pet are taken care of. What animal would you pick? It would be completely tame and obedience trained, and 100% legal.

 

@Cult you're wrong
When you first pick, you have a two in three chance of getting a bad door.
Ergo, switching doors is only going to be bad a third of the time.
Since that's relatively small, you should always switch.

@Fab you're wrong
Math majors don't necessarily hate literature
and also much of good literature deals with abstract concepts
soo yeah


QUESTIONS:
If you could control any element (of the periodic table) which would it be?
If you could control one of the four fundamental forces, which would it be?
A genie will grant you three wishes, as long as they're self-serving. What do you wish for?
Would you rather be able to become 2 bears or a hundred squirrels?

 

Continuing my obsession:

You meet a nice lady. She's sweet, kind, charming, intelligent, and witty. Things are warming up between you.

Then she confides she's a vampire, and furthermore won't have hot vampire sex with you until you agree to be her servant for the rest of your life.

Would you?

 

1. Would you rather be able to go back in time 5 minutes with a 5 minute cooldown (so you can't travel back again and again to go back further), or be able to fast forward your perceived passage of time indefinitely? You would still be able to do stuff at a normal speed when fast forwarding, it would just make a work day pass laser fast.
2. Say you're single, and on a plane. A women is sitting next to you, and you proceed to make small talk for the duration of the flight. She is completely unremarkable in looks and personality. At the end of the flight, she says that she will give you $10,000 (Canadian of course) to have sex with her in the motel a block away that she's paying for. You'll reach your destination post-flight at the same time if you say yes, and it will have no impact on future events. No one will find out, and no one will question your monetary gain. Do you say yes or no?
3. If you could stop time for 10 minutes each day, what would you do with your time? (saw this one on askreddit, genuinely curious)
4. You could have any animal as a pet. Food, living, and medical costs for this pet are taken care of. What animal would you pick? It would be completely tame and obedience trained, and 100% legal.

1. Back in time 5 minutes. I always pick this. I can do whatever I want as long as it takes less than five minutes. Think about how many things you can do in under 5 minutes, and now there are no consequences for any of them. This is the equivalent of quicksaving. It also means I can know how a conversation or a fight is going to go before I start.
2. Do I know if she's clean? If she's clean, yes, if not or unsure, no. It's... it's sex and money. I don't really see a downside.
3. I choose not to get into the physical implications of stopping time for everything but yourself and I will assume the best possible magical mechanics of this ability. It would be similar to the 5-minute rewind, in that I could grope people, but 10 minutes also isn't much. I could get places faster and get work done sooner, at least from the perspective of others. And, of course, I would use it to fuck with people. Rearrange furniture and such. I can't think of a very creative use for this one.
4. A housecat because those are the shit. Sure, I could ride a lion instead of taking the car, but that's not very practical and I can't lie on the sofa with a lion.

QUESTIONS:
If you could control any element (of the periodic table) which would it be?
If you could control one of the four fundamental forces, which would it be?
A genie will grant you three wishes, as long as they're self-serving. What do you wish for?
Would you rather be able to become 2 bears or a hundred squirrels?

1. Hydrogen, as it is common as all fuck (No really, all fucking involves hydrogen). If I have telekinetic powers over hydrogen, I can control all organic compounds and many other common compounds as well.
2. Electromagnetism so I could make my dick glow.
3. I'd ask for self-motivation, the ability to understand all points of view on any subject, and rocket boots. I believe I mentioned this before, but rocket boots are pretty fucking cool.
4. Bears are fierce and terrifying predators that will be tranquillized and thrown in a forest somewhere if they get into the city. Squirrels, however, are much less detectable and the possibilities are endless. Just imagine what you could do with 100 squirrels... probably even steal a car. Maybe I can't think of ingenious schemes right now, but give me a hundred squirrels and you would be amazed at the outcome.

Continuing my obsession:

You meet a nice lady. She's sweet, kind, charming, intelligent, and witty. Things are warming up between you.

Then she confides she's a vampire, and furthermore won't have hot vampire sex with you until you agree to be her servant for the rest of your life.

Would you?

Okay so ignoring the vampire thing, since I don't know how it changes anything:
Servant? Do I get paid? Do I get to go home at night? Is it like being married? Because being married is like serving each other. If it's just me serving her, that's a shitty marriage and no one wants that. If it's like marriage then still no, because if you look at my bio it will give you about three reasons why that's a bad idea.

 

If I'd meant marriage, I would have said marriage. If you're the vampire's pet, you'd have to fetch her stuff and do basically everything she tells you. But you'd have perks. Yes, you would get paid. Arseloads. But the downside is she might hurt you. Like, on a sliding scale from pinched wrist to broken neck.

On the other hand, would you be up for it if the vampire wanted a strictly 'friendly' relationship? Because I actually dislike sexualized vampires. I only mentioned hot vampire sex for the laughs.

 

No. Money isn't enough compensation for a broken neck, I would clearly hate this woman within days if she's going to treat me like a pet, and vampire sex would suck because she would be room temperature.

 

I had a dream last night I was being chased by these giant speaker robots, through a city. I was the only one around for some reason, I guess it didn't faze me until afterwards. Anyway, I was about to be trampled when I had this idea to plug my phone into one of the speakers so I jumped on top of one and started blasting music through the robot. That somehow was a trigger for the other robots, who all started playing the same song. On top of this, I could control the robots as long as this one song was playing, and it never occurred to me to use the repeat function or the restart button, so I had to keep going back to the beginning of the song manually every 4 minutes and it was really stressful. All I managed to do was trash some buildings accidentally before I woke up D:

 

(hey cult guess what


wrong thread)

 

nope. I was just gushing.

 

I'm gonna go with "yes," although that was an awfully unorthodox way of asking.

 

I spent a long time thinking about how to put that one, glad you got the gist of it (:

Okay, here's some tougher ones, I think.
1. Would you rather have a spouse who loves you unconditionally, but forgets everything that happened the previous day every time she wakes up (this condition would appear after a few months of marriage, so you're still in the groove of almost newly-weds), or a spouse who is also compatible with you, but refuses to get intimate?
2. What is the nicest thing someone has ever done for you? What is the nicest thing you've ever done for someone? Please don't try and downplay that second one, everyone always does.
3. If I were to buy you the gift of your choice right now, for any price, what would it be?
4. If you could change one facet of your persona, what would it be? Looks, personality traits, I don't care, just have a good reason.

And walk me through your thought process dammit, if I wanted only answers I would've given this as a Scantron.

 

if you give any advice to yourself when you were, say, 14, what would it be?
what is the most meaningful thing you've ever made or done (to you personally)?
what is the thing you hate most about your life right now?

A new update of iTunes (10.6.1) is available. Would you like to download it now?