Roonil Wazlib said:
That's not it, I used to try all the antics the other "uber-cool guys" did and I failed miserably. EVERY FUCKING TIME. So then I decided to quieten down
When in a group, people find each other funny because of two things.
1- They know and are familiar with each other.
2- The other members of the group are also amused.
This is why a joke works when "the cool kid" does it, and why the exact same joke will fall flat if that kid nobody really knows does it.
The problem, I'm guessing, is that you're trying to go too far too fast. And that almost certainly makes you come off as someone who tries too hard to get noticed. Which in turn tends to push away people... "Oh, hey man, you're Jimmy from Mrs. Rosie's english class, right? Third period? Hey, is the test today? ... Oh, that's a relief then. Thanks Jimmy." Bam. They know you exist now, and you didn't even do or say anything awkward. Your face is familiar to them and you've already broken the ice - that's one hell of a good start. If you can't work on a friendship with a head start like that, you just picked the wrong person. No big deal, try talking to other people then.
Spread yourself out a bit, meet new people, and they'll start thinking you're an ok guy after all. Those really popular guys that get all the girls? They talk with a lot of people, don't try to outshine everyone by sticking out more than "just a bit more than everyone else", and don't always expect some emotional reward out of other people. They've realized that other people are often just as willing to try to make friends as they are once. So they stop stressing out so much or trying way too hard, and succeed.
I could try opening up but I'm never confident of talking with anyone whom I don't know well (I kinda stammer at times ==*), let alone a girl I'm hoping to ask out.
The more you do something, the better you get at it. You may be uneasy around other people right now but you'll find that as you get used to being around others, you adapt and get much better at it. It's exactly like, say, swimming. At first it seems impossible but one day you're casually doing the backstroke and wondering how something that feels so natural and intuitive could've ever been so difficult for you.
If it makes you feel any better, everyone goes through this phase where they have to learn how to open up and take social "risks." Trust me, we've all had to learn what confidence is and we've all had to put up with awkward, uncomfortable moments around others.
