Depression

Sep 14, 2015 at 2:52 AM
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Depression is many things for many people. A mental problem. An act. Something to pity. Everyday life. This is what it is for me.
It's the feeling of knowing that you absolutley suck. Lazy. Wimpy. Unsuccesful. Bull Headed. Aggressive. Yeah, all that stuff. It's also knowing that no matter what, it won't change. Only hide, to be dug back up again. Medicine? Temporary solution. Once your off that, back to sad land. Theropy? It helps some, really. It's good. Try that if your really feeling bad. Sometimes it just doesn't work though. Sometimes, it's burned into your brain, a canyon, continuosly being cut into by a river of repeated reminders of what you really are, good feelings being swept due to the psychological erosion of your sentimentl sediments. People, loved ones sometimes, reminding you that you are whatever bad thing you are. But they are wrong. You want to help people. You want to make it so people have what you have. People think you are greedy, manipulative, putting up an act, spoiled, yet you want nothing more than to give it all to someone else, to give your food to someone else, to relieve your loved ones of having to deal with a depressed person, and have someone who can actualy be happy. But you know it will never happen. You know that you are in fact greedy, manipulative, and spoiled. You can't handle getting messy, being yelled at by a person, flinch at everyone because you think you are always doing something wrong. Everybody always says it, it's true but also not. You just don't know. You just want to not have to deal with it. The false accusations. The true accusations. Being yelled at, and cared for. You just want it to end. Sometimes you convince yourself that you must die. So you do. But the more painful path happens when you just can't. You feel to afraid. You give up. You know people would miss you, you would cause pain. They care. They actualy care. But you don't want them to be hurt. You want them to not care, so you can be selfish and not at the same time, and end. You make them dislike you. You become disrespectful. You push their buttons, start to show the more greedy side of you, and keep the selflessness hidden inside. You get to the point where you've lied and decieved to the point where they wouldn't believe you if you said you where depressed. They'd think it would be another act. They remind you all the time how bad you are, and that just widens the crack of sadness. They also tell you how they still love you, though. Every time you feel like the end will finaly come, they forgive you. They don't give in. If only the cyclistic hell would stop, yet it doesn't. And there is no way out. You have reached rock bottom, where you can only doubt every single thought you have. This is, what I feel, the worst depression one can have. This is where I am. This is me.
 
Sep 14, 2015 at 3:58 AM
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You must consider that when you expect the things in your life to be negative you will always see them as such. Things that are negative in your eyes may not always be, and this can be frustrating for those around you because such actions just push people away. Think first about how you are viewing the world and how that world might otherwise be interpreted before you take something in a negative light.

Secondly depression can make you feel like you have no energy to bother doing anything, so be a yes man and force yourself to interact with the world. Think "what would non-depressed me do" and go do it, and no excuses.
 
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Sep 14, 2015 at 4:07 AM
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tfw too depressed to hit enter key
 
Sep 14, 2015 at 5:37 AM
tem go to colleg and make u prouds!!!
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I'm sorry but I couldn't read this due to errors like "theropy" "your really feeling" "absolutly" and "unsuccesful" in addition to being horribly long
can you please summarize this in a shorter form
is it about you do you need help or something
is it just an essay you decided to write
is it meant to be read by depressed people
do you have a friend who is depressed and needs help
or whatever else
 
Sep 14, 2015 at 6:14 AM
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I find this thread on it's own pretty depressing.
 
Sep 14, 2015 at 7:41 AM
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This is actually an extremely serious subject, which you would know if any of you actually bothered to read the first post.

You do not joke about this sort of thing.
 
Sep 14, 2015 at 11:04 AM
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This is actually an extremely serious subject, which you would know if any of you actually bothered to read the first post.

You do not joke about this sort of thing.
I'm not even trying to be remotely funny, reading the first post actually is a bit depressing and actually made me think about life.

Then again, it was like 6:50 in the morning when I read it.
 
Sep 14, 2015 at 11:14 AM
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As @andwhyisit said, depression is most definitely a serious matter. @Bionicobot didn't make this post because he wants attention, but because he needs it. When depression is left untreated, it can and will lead to scuicide attempts as a way to end the unbearable pain...

What's good is that @Bionicobot approached the forums for help; most other signs would not be noticed in a non-in-person environment.
 
Sep 14, 2015 at 5:32 PM
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Bionicobot didn't ask for help. You can tell by how he wrapped up with this, instead of a plea for help:
This is, what I feel, the worst depression one can have.
He's venting because it's easier to type all that out and post it on the infinite and unfeeling internet than have that conversation with someone in real life. He thinks he can't be helped, he's lied too much, he's gone too far, and pity is the best he can hope for. So while he obviously still needs help, and isn't beyond saving, there's no advice or reassurance I can give that he'd take seriously. Depression is self-fulfilling, so if Bionicobot thinks he's shitty and broken, that's depressing enough to keep him depressed and some kind words from me won't break the cycle. He's just wrong about himself, his life, his worth, his family, his friends, etc., and can't see it rationally. Not accusing him of being stupid, that's just what depression is.
This is why Bionicobot doesn't see any way to heal: he doesn't realize that depression is irrational. He can't see how fucking wrong he is about all sorts of shit, and it's not my place to correct him because I don't even know the guy. Before he can ask us (or anyone, maybe) for help, he would need to admit he's wrong. Not wrong about being depressed, but wrong about how others perceive him, wrong about how he perceives himself, and most importantly, wrong about there being nowhere to go but down.
 
Sep 15, 2015 at 6:58 AM
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The weird thing is that depression itself is actually not very irrational at all.
A lot of things are wrong in the world, and it's good to be able to feel sad about that.

The important thing to remember is that no matter how hard we try not to be, we are all unique.
It's always worth living because of that uniqueness. I'm not sure if anyone cares about me, but I don't mind.

Anyway.. it's interesting that the internet can provide support for a lot of people.
For me, it didn't really work; I think it made things worse. So maybe I'll be less active online.
 
Sep 20, 2015 at 9:00 PM
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I'm pretty sure that depression roots from the fact that humans have a negativity bias. What would I mean by that? We have a tendency to focus on what's bad as opposed to what's good. For example, in the second sentence of this post, you focused on the word "would" because it should have been "do."
 
Sep 20, 2015 at 9:13 PM
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I'm pretty sure that depression roots from the fact that humans have a negativity bias. What would I mean by that? We have a tendency to focus on what's bad as opposed to what's good. For example, in the second sentence of this post, you focused on the word "would" because it should have been "do."
Personally, I find it hard to concentrate on negativity anymore.
 
Sep 20, 2015 at 9:14 PM
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Sep 23, 2015 at 10:20 PM
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Everything CF said is true. From what i've read you have a warped perspective about yourself that you're garbage when you're not, it's a cycle that won't end untill you move out of it.
When you're depressed misery is a comfortable position to sit in, moving on is far more scarier since you're risking yourself to fail again. In a sense it's way easier to not care about everything than start putting value into things you like, because when you think you'll fail it won't hurt as much if you didn't care about it anyway. But by caring about things and feeling accomplished/good about them is a good way to move on. Getting rid of negativity in your life is a good idea, too.

I'm mostly speaking from experience w/ my depression, hope it helps!
 
Sep 23, 2015 at 11:14 PM
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I don't agree with what @Captain Fabulous said. To say depression is "self-fulfilling" and "irrational" is making a generalization.
Everyone experiences depression differently; don't make generalizations, and please use the word "I" when talking about your experiences.

@Bionicobot still hasn't clarified what they meant by their post, so who knows what kind of advice we should be trying to provide.
 
Sep 24, 2015 at 12:56 AM
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Depression is an emotional state that is made worse by being depressed. Emotions strongly affect rationality. I'm not making generalizations, I'm telling you about depression.
 
Sep 24, 2015 at 1:09 AM
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I have to agree with Cpt. Fab on this one, that's depression in a nutshell.
 
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Sep 24, 2015 at 1:54 AM
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A new hobby will dissolve your depression. Get into a club or try some art, turn your sadness into something creative and meaningful.

I'm certain you can find help if you think you need it, you just have to look for it.
 
Sep 24, 2015 at 8:42 AM
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Depression is an emotional state that is made worse by being depressed. Emotions strongly affect rationality. I'm not making generalizations, I'm telling you about depression.

That doesn't even make sense. If you are depressed, then you can say that you have depression. It doesn't mean you have clinical depression.
If you have depression, then you are depressed. Depression can impact emotions in various ways, and other psychiatric problems may be involved.
Depression is not considered to be an emotional state. By saying "emotions strongly affect rationality" you are further demonstrating your lack of understanding.
Strong emotions can affect rationality significantly however rationality is a very complex subject, and I feel it is best not to discuss it in this topic.

You are making dangerous generalizations. In your initial post, you suggested that @Bionicobot was wrong, that is not even remotely helpful advice.

A new hobby will dissolve your depression. Get into a club or try some art, turn your sadness into something creative and meaningful.

I'm certain you can find help if you think you need it, you just have to look for it.

A new hobby is a great suggestion, but it doesn't necessarily help. Definitely worth trying though.
 
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