Mar 24, 2011 at 4:10 AM
Join Date: Jun 12, 2009
Location: Dracula's Castle
Posts: 570
Age: 31
This is a spambot post from another forum I go on. There was just no fucking way I could have not posted this.
(Thread titled "Bill Gates' Adventures in Heaven")
(Thread titled "Bill Gates' Adventures in Heaven")
Ever wondered what heaven looks like ?
Bill Gates died and, much to everyone's surprise, went to Heaven. When he got there, he had to wait in the reception area. starzmart
Heaven's reception area was the size of Massachusetts. There were literally millions of people milling about, living in tents with nothing to do all day. Food and water were being distributed from the backs of trucks, while baby monitors staffers with clipboards slowly worked their way through the crowd. Bill lived in a tent for three weeks until, finally, one of the staffers approached him. The staffer was a young man in his late teens, face scarred with acne. He was wearing a blue T-shirt with the words TEAM PETER emblazoned on it in large yellow lettering.
"Hello," said the staffer in a bored voice vedio baby monitors that could have been the voice of any clerk in any overgrown bureaucracy. "My name is Gabriel and I'll be your induction coordinator." Bill started to ask a question, but Gabriel interrupted him. "No, I'm not the Archangel Gabriel. I'm just a guy from Philadelphia named Gabriel who died in a car wreck at the age of 17. Now give me your name, last name first, unless you were Chinese in which case it's first name first."
"Gates, Bill." Gabriel started searching though the sheaf of papers on his clipboard, looking for Bill's Record of Earthly Works. "What's going on here?" asked Bill. "Why are all these people here? Where's Saint Peter? Where are the Pearly Gates?"