Sep 30, 2019 at 8:55 PM
Quote and Curly enter the scene.
Meanwhile, in a parallel universe, you're playing Borderlands 2, and you just got the Bane. You (or rather, your player character) were warned that the weapon was supposedly cursed. You check the Bane's stats, which are actually pretty good. It's got an elemental effect, which automatically makes it better than most of your weapons. Damage, fire rate, reload speed, accuracy, ammo capacity—all of those stats are pretty decent. It's apparently a sub-machine gun manufactured by Hyperion, so it's got that "negative recoil" gimmick going on for it. Ignoring any and all superstitious claims made toward this weapon, you equip it as your primary weapon. You immediately notice that your movement speed has been reduced to a crawl. You switch to one of your secondary weapons and notice that you can now move at normal speed. You switch back to the Bane, and your speed is reduced. Not only that, you hear a rather annoying voice yell "SWAPPIN' WEAPONS!"
Great, you think to yourself. A speed penalty, coupled with an annoying voice module. Just what I needed.
You switch back to your secondary weapon, head to the nearest fast-travel station, and fast-travel to an area loosely populated with weak enemies to test out the Bane, which is already proving to be rather impractical, what with the speed penalty. You come across a group of bandits.
Perfect, you think to yourself. You equip the Bane.
And then you fire it.
As the weapon's voice module assaults your ears, you can't help but burst into laughter. You kill off all of the bandits in the area, try to take their loot, and then remember the speed penalty associated with the Bane and switch to a secondary weapon. As you loot the area, you can't help but have this one thought:
This gun just made my fuckin' day.
Here's a link to a YouTube video demonstrating the Bane in all it's glory.