Jan 15, 2013 at 10:41 PM
So I'll elaborate on my problems with the story. These problems of which aren't entirely your fault, but a lot of it falls into the category of "Fanboy weeabo who thinks he knows best". So I'll elaborate on my problems with your critique. These problems of which are entirely your fault, but a lot of it falls into the category of "Retard 20-year-old who thinks he knows best." I'm reciting these problems from memory, mind you; but if the problem itself is more memorable than what might have been an already-existing solution, then it's still just as equally a problem.
1) Who the fuck is "Asura"?
I had to seriously open the game in Booster's Lab to double check the name, it was so generic and unmemorable. It's not a name, it's a title. Asura essentially means "a non-deity with deity-like powers". But I did remember that this character was not only completely unexplained prior to the mirror fragments, but he seemed to suddenly become the final boss for no reason whatsoever. This was not a character created by or inspired by the original mod's unfinished state - you made this thing up completely on your own merit, and it simply doesn't fit. It "simply doesn't fit"? Are you fucking kidding me? Yeah, everyone knows that MagicDoors' part isn't nearly as good as Shmitz's, but here's the thing: it's MagicDoors' part. This is MagicDoors' mod. Who are you to say that it "doesn't fit"? For all we know this sort of thing may have been exactly what Shmitz wanted. I'm pretty sure that he would do something more like what MagicDoors did than to just add a couple Oblivion stages to beat him and then POW! You win. Sure, MagicDoors' story might not be exactly what Shmitz had in mind, but doing this and actual adding to the mod rather than simply "finishing" it is far better. And I'm sure anything you come up with would suck at least twice as much.
"Ballos" in the original Cave Story may not have been properly introduced until the extra dungeon, but he has a hell of a lot more backstory than "Asura", and a much more original name to boot. God why do you even think Asura is a less original name than Ballos, I've never seen anyone use it. The first time we're informed of Ballos' existence is in an ominous bonus scene as you set up your game for the extra dungeon, followed by additional information to give you an understanding of who Ballos is, and what he had become.
But "Asura"? All we're told is he was some demon sealed away in a shitty mirror that you phoned into the game for seemingly no reason. This shitty mirror is way better than the shitty weapon you'd get in the original JNR. The four pieces thing was (and had been even in the original) a part of the mod and he wasn't going to remove it. I was under the impression that this mirror was going to be a usable item that would teleport you to a hellish bonus dungeon on the spot outside the plot -- a much, MUCH better idea than was executed PFFFFFTAHAHAHA you think that's a good idea? hahaha-- and instead you turned this phoned in apparition into the only final boss of the game.
Ballos EXCITED me, and STILL does with his imposing backstory greeting you every run through Sacred Ground. But "Asura"? I don't know who he is.
2) Who the fuck is this other "Genesis"?
I see what you did here. I have the game open in Booster's Lab, and I can see three things.
i) There is no "Defeated Genesis!" after the Genesis: Source boss. Woaah, look at this 1337 hacker, looking at the mod's script!
ii) Misery's easily missable and entirely not worth it in the slightest extra text taunting you sloppily with what you think is "foreboding" but is actually "bad writing" Why the hell you think this was supposed to be foreboding is beyond me.
iii) You're an idiot. You just keep making this more and more fun.
Besides this, it's my understanding that even if you beat the "real" Genesis (Who is incredibly phoned in and disruptively sloppy),If it's so sloppy tell him whatever the fuck you think it is that makes him sloppy so he can fix it, don't just say "ur mod sucks" with big words. you die and game over unless you have some stupid mirror you added just because you like shiny things. He didn't add the mirror, he removed the Polaris, a horrible OP weapon from the old version. The four piece search, as I've said, was going to be in the original JN as well. This not only ruins the game itself as an overarching story, but this tell me that you really, REALLY think that "Don't tell the player anything until the big reveal!" is a good way to write a story. You're bad at finding dialogue, apparently. Please see (iii) for my, and anyone who's older than 20's, response to that idea. Oh my God you're going to say something about me being 13 aren't you? This is like Christmas. Easter and my birthday all wrapped together in one idiot user!
3) What the fuck is going on with King?
We get it! King was your all time favorite Mimiga character! His death was tragic! You didn't like him dying! You wanted to write fanfiction! "But he's dead! HOW DO I DO THAT?"
Luckily, you completely misunderstand referential sequencing in art. What was originally a reference specifically, and ONLY to point out that the blade was still on the island and still housed King's soul, you turned into a destructively bad idea that King was "still alive" in some way or form, so you could plaster him all over the walls for your own lazy story telling. In fact, you went so far to do this that you decided King's sword should be even more magic and better than the original! So you made it BLOOD CRIMSON RED AND PUT THE WORD "TIME" IN ITS NAME! HOLY FUCK, WATCH OUT STEPHEN KING WE GOT A FUCKIN' SHAKESPHERE UP IN THIS CRIB! Haha you think the Time Reaver is King's Blade. It's just some magical sword.
4) What the fuck is even the hell? What the fuck is even this title?
As I said a few posts ago, the original Jenka's Nightmare wasn't a masterpiece of sequential storytelling, nor was it even very passable in the first place. I was personally entirely confused after Genesis: Water because I didn't know what was going on. I wasn't told to go here by the game, and nothing in the game coincides with even being there. Which generally means it's filler. You're obviously bad at playing games because from Genesis: Water onwards the game is fairly linear.
This could be fixed mind you, and a better explanation could be given for each individual area. This is the point of the 'Cthulhu' NPCs - mysterious bystanders who hand out third-person information onto the area and story without shoving it down your throat. In fact, from memory, I don't recall seeing one ever again after the Labyrinth circle maze, and it would do well to have them breath a bit of life into the areas that are otherwise boring and meaningless to the plot. I agree with you here, the Cthulhus were really well done by Shmitz.
5) Why the fuck do all the characters from your half of the game refer to Quote as 'soldier'?
No seriously, what the Woo random linebreaks are cool, right?
fuck? This isn't foreboding anything or referring to anything. It's just dumb. I don't really see the problem here...? He is a soldier, after all, why not call him that?
Oh hell no, nobody hates on this mod without my permission or written permission from three highly reputed members of the Cave Story Modding Community (henceforth referred to as the CSMC) in the form of signed documents mailed to your address with a carbon copy sent to me.
Well, it's time to show you everything that's wrong with your critique.
Read the quote.